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Confidence and self-esteem

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Problems with confidence and self-esteem can sometimes be caused through psychological injuries occurring at crucial times of self-development.


Self-worth and shyness issues are frequently successfully addressed through psychotherapy and counselling. If you're looking for a therapist in Brighton and Hove or online who can help you with confidence and self-esteem click below or use the contact form at the end of this section.

Self-esteem is absolutely critical to our ability to navigate the worlds of work, relationships and personal development.


Confidence is something many people seem to have in buckets, yet it can also be a mask which aims to detract from painful feelings of inadequacy, shame or self-criticism.


True confidence, on the other hand, is easily recognisable. 

It shines from the inside out and is a reflection of someone's authentic self-belief, humility and grounded, loving acceptance of who they really are.



What causes low self-esteem?

Low self-esteem often begins earlier in life when we're particularly susceptible to both positive and negative messages about ourselves.


These messages were usually received from parents, teachers, friends and other sources such as TV, magazines or social media. 

If what you interpreted from these messages was that you weren't 'normal' or 'good enough' for some reason, perhaps you felt compared to high ideals or a sibling's or parent's achievements or attributes, then you may have internalised an inner sense of not being clever enough, attractive enough, caring enough or worthy of love and attention.


Eventually, the expectations you most struggle with living up to are those you continue to hold about yourself.

There can be particular triggers for low self-esteem, such as a disappointment at work or college, the loss or breakdown of a relationship, or experiencing abuse, humiliation, prejudice or stigma.

Occasionally it can also feel that a drop in self-belief has happened gradually, or for no specific reason.

If you're suffering from low self-esteem of low self-confidence you may have developed certain ways of hiding from situations which otherwise tend to trigger feelings of shame and inadequacy.


This might mean avoiding friends or intimate relationships, or feeling unable to speak up for or distance yourself from unhealthy situations or relationships.


Maybe you've put off doing things you find challenging or exposing and now it feels like your whole world is growing smaller and you with it.

If you've been living for a long time with poor self-esteem you might also be struggling with other problems which may be related to this such as alcohol or drug misuse, relationship problems, depression, and anxiety.

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what happens when we have low self-esteem and low self-confidence?
counselling and psychotherapy for self-esteem and confidence

Because problems with self-esteem often have their origins in relationship or interactions of some kind, it can be useful to think of the pathway to healing as follows:


"Whatever has gone wrong in relationship can be put right in relationship"


This means that the alliance you build with your therapist can prove to be your greatest ally in tackling issues of self-confidence.


Together as a team you will begin to get to the bottom of where your opinions about yourself might stem from and whether, deep down, you really judge these beliefs to be true, lifelong and unchangeable.


More often than not this will be something you notice gradually shifting as the therapy continues.


Becoming more aware of how your current feelings and how your history can continue to impact who you are today can be surprising and transformational.


Counselling and psychotherapy can help with problems of self-esteem through helping you to notice the patterns of thinking which are underpinning your current self-experience.


Therapy can also help you to move past any feelings of self-criticism and self-blame which are outdated or unjustified.


With me, you will feel supported and held within an empathic therapeutic relationship, respected and valued as an individual and enabled to develop self-confidence, self-belief and a powerful voice of your own.

Click here to start a conversation about improving
your confidence and self-esteem


If you'd like any further information on Pathways Psychotherapy and Counselling in Brighton & Hove or if you'd like
to arrange a telephone consultation or book an appointment please get in touch by using this form 
or call me directly on 07590 506567

Thank you, I'll be in touch soon.

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